The Complete List of Briggism

[JC Sharp]

Every once in a while EPW welcomes a new member to our boards, Johnny Briggs welcomes them with a lovely personalized message.

Quote:Welcome to the jungle, we've got fun & games... but we ask that you play with one game at a time & tidy up after yourself

Welcome to the Jonny Briggs Centre For Excellence in Grammer & Excellence!

Welcome to the jungle, we've got fun & games... & drugs, oh so many drugs

Welcome to Evolution. Where the big boys play... with themselves
Bonjour

Welcome to Evolution. Please don't feed Rettop after midnight

Welcome to Evolution. Home of the 13th most attractive e-fedder in the business.

Welcome to Evolution Wrestling where green text is sexy again

Welcome to Evolution. Now with 40% more Clausons

Welcome to Evolution. You brought porn? You're alright by me. If there is one thing the internet needs, it's more porn

Welcome to Evolution. Sponsored by Cocaine, the official internasal narcotic of EW

Welcome to Evolution. Where the drinks & chicks are imaginary but the hatred gets very real!

Welcome to Evolution. The alternative to eBay & pornography

Welcome to Evolution. The first rule of Evolution is you do not talk about Evolution. The second rule of Evolution is you do not talk- no wait, the second rule is no assholes

Welcome to Evolution. Where the shit hits the fan

Welcome to Evolution. The internet's version of herpes

Welcome to Evolution. We make learning fun... you just won't do any

Welcome to Evolution. Where the sex isn't always optional

Welcome to Evolution. Bringing literacy back to the internet since '09

Welcome to Evolution. Keeping logic at bay since 2009

Welcome to Evolution. Where the e-beers are always cold & the e-women are always hot

Welcome to Evolution. Where incorrect spelling is punishable by def...wait no!!! (gunshot)

Welcome to Evolution. It's like football but without the pads... or the ball... or the field... or, okay it's nothing like football!

Welcome to Evolution. The only place where the macarena is still cool.

Welcome to Evolution. Spiritual home of facial hair & venereal disease

Welcome to Evolution. Please try to keep your typing to index fingers only

Welcome to Evolution. Official supporter of the "Kevin Sullivan did it theory"

Welcome to Evolution. We are the ones who were dogsitting for Michael Vick!

Welcome to Evolution. The only place where a Canadian can become champion!

Welcome to Evolution (again!) Where forgetting passwords is punishable by death or worse... jobbing to Deas!

Welcome to Evolution. If Shakespeare were still alive he'd be jobbing to Rex!

Welcome to Evolution. We are the ones who launched Miley Cyrus' career... you're welcome!

Welcome to Evolution. Our roster are e-wrestlers by day, e-superheroes by night (one of us is an e-hooker by early morning... you know who you are!)

Welcome to Evolution. We're slightly less complicated than Rock 'em, Sock em' Robots

Welcome to Evolution. When it's time to party we will party hard... then go for a little nap

Welcome to Evolution. The only website on the internet that guarantees to be Tila Tequila free

Welcome to Evolution. Our roster are all fundamentalist Christians with chronic body odour... Wait, come back!

[Mike Powers]

Best. Thread. Ever.

[Madman Szalinski]

If this doesn't get updated with each new Briggism, I will feel cheated.

[Jonny Briggs]

I'm going to update this list in 7's. (Why 7? I like the number 7, also fuck you you aren't my real dad don't tell me what to do! )

Quote:Welcome to Evolution. Our roleplays are more revered than the Bible... except Szalinski's which have been compared to a particularly tedious Where's Waldo book

Welcome to Evolution. The only place since Ancient Greece where "wrestling" naked is not only acceptable but practiced on a daily basis.

Welcome to Evolution. The reason your girlfriend left you & you didn't notice until two weeks later

Welcome to Evolution. The only place where you can kick someone's ass while simultaneously tackling a pizza & beer

Welcome to Evolution. We're the best in the world at what we do... we just don't do a lot

Welcome to Evolution. Where the word of the day is always "Cunt"

Welcome to Evolution. We enjoy astronomy & long walks on the beach & we aren't looking for anything too serious, just friends to begin with & see where it goes from there